5 Ways To Think Like A Queen

In Devotions, Inspiration by Kristen Dalton Wolfe9 Comments


In this world, you have to be your own cheerleader. You have the power to control your thoughts, your thoughts shouldn’t control you. Just because a thought drifts into your head doesn’t mean you have to dwell on it. The book of Proverbs says, “So a person thinketh in his heart, so he becomes.” The power of the mind is pretty popular in culture, so it’s not a stunning or new concept. But are we actually being intentional with the thoughts on which we mediate?

Maybe, you have a dream in your heart that seems so far off, so unattainable, so out of reach. It seems like it will take so much work, support and resources to see that dream come to light. Even the very thought of all that can be so daunting that we quit before we even start. Believe me, I have felt that many times on this journey of starting SheisMore.com and my big visions for it. In those times, I feel so defeated that I want to crawl in bed…well I do crawl in bed. But then after a couple days, okay sometimes a few weeks of self-pity go by, I remind myself of what I did to achieve the dream of Miss USA.

Our dreams aren’t going to happen without intense intentionality on thinking like a queen.

In the years leading up to Miss USA, my family didn’t have the money to buy me a winning wardrobe or pay for entry fees. I dealt with painful cystic acne that I couldn’t hide and my face hurt to smile. I was the new girl at school and to make matters worse, even my love for dance was tainted when I was placed in a dance company with elementary aged girls. I was the uncomfortably tall girl that stuck out in class as the only teenager. Basically I felt like a wanted to melt into the floor a lot or become invisible and there wasn’t a lot of validation pointing to the fact that I could become Miss USA.

Maybe you can relate. We can’t count on our external factors to motivate us because we can’t control those. But we can control our thoughts.

When I was excluded or rejected, I would drift off in my head and think, “It’s okay, I’m going to be Miss USA one day.” When I looked in the mirror and saw pain, ugliness, loneliness and depression, I thought, “It’s okay, I’m going to be Miss USA one day.

I wanted to be a queen so I had to think like a queen. You may not want to be a queen in the sense of winning a pageant. But you do want to be the queen of your dreams.

The exciting part is that you already are a queen in God’s kingdom, as His beloved daughter. Now you just have to get in agreement with your King and think like it.

Here are 5 ways to think like a queen:

1. Agree with God

“Can two walk together, unless they be agreed?” Amos 3:3 NKJV

I love this verse so much, it says it all. You can’t walk with God unless you agree with Him. Just like you can’t build a business, family or relationship where this isn’t agreement. Agree with what God says about you, agree about the direction you are going and agree with the promises He has spoken. You can’t really know what those things are though unless you read His word and spend time with Him. The more time you spend with God and study His word, the more quickly you can decipher thoughts that are of Him and thoughts that aren’t. However, thoughts from God are always life-giving, never destructive (John 6:63). He provides clarity, not confusion (1 Corinthians 14:33) and He is convicting, not condemning (John 16:8).

2. Take Every Thought Captive

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 1 Corinthians 10:5 NIV

You are royalty as God’s daughter, you live in His kingdom and his Spirit lives within you.   But you also still live in a broken world full of sin and temptation, bullying, pain and suffering. We are in a medium, in between two realms. Our real home is the Kingdom of Heaven and our temporary home is the world. The bible is very clear when it calls us to be in the world, but not of the world. (John 17:16) As a matter of fact, Jesus says not to leave the world but to stay away from the evil one and his tactics.

Keeping away from the enemy’s tactics all starts in our minds. Our mind is the first thing Satan will attack and then fuel if our thoughts feed it by agreeing with his lies. When a thought enters your mind that is anything but love and life-giving; acknowledge it, delete it and then replace it with one that is of God. It’s perfectly  normal for hateful, mean, bitter, destructive thoughts to drift in our minds, but it becomes a problem when we mediate on them and make them grow.

3. Think About Beauty

So a man thinketh in his heart, so he becomes.

Often we hear a successful person say, “I ate, slept and breathed ______.” It may sound consuming, but it’s true. It means they thought about that goal or dream most of the time, which motivated their actions, behavior and discipline. When I was preparing for Miss USA,  I decided to think like I already was Miss USA. In the same sense, you already are a queen so imagine yourself as that confident, empowered woman walking in her destiny.

Thinking like this shouldn’t give you a sense of strife or inadequacy because remember, you aren’t fighting to become something you aren’t. You are focusing on the queen you already are in the heavenly realms. Your original design is beautiful, pure and inspiring. Think about the woman God made you to be before you were born when He crafted you in your mother’s womb and chose very bit of your personality and physicality.

Every time you think a negative thought about yourself, replace that thought with the queen God made you to be. Think like the queen you are.


4.   Remember The Power of The Kingdom

If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. Colossians 3:1-2

We are so lucky that we don’t have to be ruled by what we see in the world or what makes sense in our logical mind. Living as God’s daughter, with Christ on your side, your life can look radically different than it does right now. Earthly problems are so menial and minuscule compared to what God can do.

This verse says that you have been raised with Christ.  Wow. You are not dead, meaningless, hopeless or lost. You are raised with Christ and called to seek the things that are above. How different would your life be if you set your mind on the power of Heaven every day? It can’t just be in the morning, we have to reset our minds numerous times a  day, as many times as it takes on the wonder and beauty of heaven.

Infuse your life by thinking about the fact that you are supported and equipped with the resources and strength of God’s power.


5. Think About Whatever is Lovely

And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Philippians 4:8 NLT

When Paul was teaching the believers, he couldn’t let them go without the final message about how to think. This verse tells us how to think and what to think about. Even as I write about this, I think about the lyrics in the song on the radio today and the sad or angry posts on my Facebook feed. Whatever messages we allow into our minds will manifest in our subconscious thoughts. In order to think like a queen, we have to monitor the messages we intake.

A daughter of God is called to think about herself, others, adversity, her dreams, hopes and desires with truth and excellence. The truth is that God has plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)

It’s time to decide the kind of woman you want to be. It’s time to set your mind on God’s truths and to dwell on thoughts that are pleasing to God and productive for your life.

God’s Promises + Your Agreement = The Sparkle Effect



Dear father,

You know every one of my thoughts, you know the dark places I tend to go. God, I confess my current thought life doesn’t honor myself or you. I struggle with anxiety and depression and it’s so easy to fall back into that cycle. Positive thinking hasn’t worked. But your Word will not return void because your Word isn’t just positive thoughts. Your Word is living and active and sharper than any double edged sword. Please help me to choose the beauty, promise and love from you to meditate  on. Point me to the right scriptures that will speak directly to me. Protect my mind with the helmet of truth and salvation. When I can’t think of anything good to think about, I will be thankful for the gift of eternal life. Thank you for giving me the mind of Christ. Help me to think like the queen you made me to be so I may sparkle your radiance in this world. Amen.

Wonder Words:

Isaiah 55:11, Hebrews 4:12, Ephesians 6:17, Romans 12:2, Isaiah 26:3

If this message blessed, leave a comment and share it with others!


  1. Dominique

    So weird to think we are already queens and yet we are constantly tempted to be slaves of this world. . We have to continually remind ourselves that we are loved and enough and that’s okay. Thank you for this 🙏🏽

  2. Ashley

    Hello! Thanks for this amazing article, I came across this on Pinterest and saved it in my browser to read… I just read it today. I have struggled with a lot of things you mentioned you struggled with in your post. But lately I’ve been trying to keep my mind and thoughts focused on the Lord and what he says. It’s so easy to get caught up in the hype and trends of the world. It’s been a struggle for me. The last few years of myself. But I’m truly thankful for this article and how it has helped me to get back on track. God bless you.

  3. Marylou

    This was the first email in my inbox as I checked this evening and I am so thankful for it! Thank you for such a beautifully written post, I NEEDED to read this today, wonderful encouragement. Great reminders that our true beauty lies within us, who the Lord made us to be. Confidence is an area that I have definitely struggled with my entire life, it is nice to read something that is both encouraging and relatable. Thank you again; God bless you.

  4. Pingback: 5 Ways To Think Like A Queen | Merry Sole

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