The Reason God Created Marriage

In Wife Life by Kristen Dalton Wolfe4 Comments

It is the first time I have been sleeping at my home alone since Kris and I have been married. I knew it was going to feel strange when he was gone on his work trip, but I am struck at how much I feel like a little confused kid who just got dropped off at kindergarten. I never truly understood the meaning of the verse, “and the two will become one” until now. The bond of a God centered covenant literally unifies you in the spirit. Being apart feels like half of me is missing, which is slightly alarming if you think about it. I’m like, “How did I live alone for 2 years? How would I cope if something happened to him? Is it healthy to feel this way?”

But then, I remembered that God created marriage between man and woman to emulate our union to Christ. When we start to fall away from Jesus or clench on to life’s steering wheel too tightly, we might start to feel lost or like a cloud is over us. Life just doesn’t seem to flow as smoothly. Jesus says in John 23: “I in them, and you in me, that they may be made perfect in one.” Marriage keeps you in check. God calls us to love one another as He loves us. I’d say the way we are loving our husbands is a good indicator of how we are abiding in Jesus.

God never said living our life according to His call and great purpose would be easy. But we do know that when we abide in Him, there is like a supernatural grace on us and whatever we put our hands to. We don’t have to strive so hard because we operate from a place of rest, knowing that He goes before us to prepare the way. We have access to an overflow of joy and peace regardless of our circumstances, no matter how dark they are.

The biblical concept of “submission” to our husbands often gets a bad rap. But the greek translation of submission means to come under the same mission. When we are partnering with God’s mission, our gifts and talents are maximized and He is glorified. We honor God and our cup overflows with His grace and favor. It’s like a well-oiled machine. Marriage is the same way. When we align with the same mission of our husbands, he is empowered by our respect and abilities and in turn He is convicted to love us better.

There is a reason that God says, “Two is better than one” and “A strand of three chords is not easily broken.” Ecclesiastes 4: 9&12. I pray that you will feel the beauty of this unity in your marriage now or your future marriage. The power of prayer can protect and restore your marriage, which of course is highly preyed on by many forms of the enemy.

Prayer: Father, thank you for creating the unity of marriage to represent what your love is like for me. God, you never leave me in my ugly moments and you always love me to restoration. I pray that you will give me the grace to love my husband through all of his weak moments. I thank you, that you will enable me to speak kind words that offer refreshment, to pray instead of fight, and to be silent rather than criticize. I want my marriage to be an example of your unfailing love. You say that love never fails, so I declare that by your power and strength, the love in my marriage will never fail. In Jesus name, Amen.


  1. Kristen,

    I’m so happy for you and Kris! Having lived with the man for five years, I can tell you that I’m so glad he finally found a special lady to marry. I’m so glad you guys are blogging and spreading God’s grace on the Internet. Keep up the wonderful work! 🙂

    Kris’s Old Flatmate (and Writer About Marriage & Parenthood),

    Chad Thomas Johnston

  2. Don’t forget, we are called to “submit to one another” – it is not the woman submitting to the husband’s plan, it is the two coming together to submit yourselves to a new plan, a new one-ness under god that did not exist before. This to me is far more beautiful and a more realistic picture of marriage. We are in no way called to our ‘husband’s mission’ – we are called to a new communal mission of one-ness in Christ. The longer a marriage lasts, ideally the more this becomes evident.

  3. I can’t tell you how in love with this I am! It has always been my belief that both man and woman should want to give their all to each other. Not because they feel like they have to. My motto has always been “anything for my man” but it will not work if it is not reciprocated. With just one person doing most of the giving and sacrificing in a realationship is almost ensuring it can’t last.

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